| Wooooooo Fun Times at mi casa!!! |
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| 12:14pm 12/02/2004 |
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Well..not exactly. So its been pretty boring lately. Extremely boring is more like it. I am going back to school at Perimeter..which is good becuase I felt like if I was out of school any longer I would turn into someone as dumb as Jessica Simpson...hehe..chicken or tuna. dumb bitch. Anyways. Yea Im back in school, I like it. I think being in school and seeing people I know everyday is good for me. I dreaded going back for a while becuase I was thinking that all it would do is remind me of Milledgeville and I would go straight back to the depression pill popping state i was in for a while. But that didnt happen, so its all good. I still miss it terribly. I just push it to the back of my mind and I try my best not think of it but its hard becuase there are so many things that remind me of it. Ill be in fucking kroger, for example, and they are playing 'Dont You Want Me Baby' on the radio and that takes me back to Buffingtons where me and Heather sang that song at Karaoke. So its a no win situation here I guess. Milledgeville will have my soul forever, thats how it is. O look at this I made myself depressed again. Im good at doing that. Jesus Christ where is peter pan when you need him...I just need some happy thoughts so I can fly my happy ass to Milledgeville and see everyone who mean everything to me.
BAH!
Work...o lord..is getting Dramatic. I understand now when so many people leave abercrombie and fitch after a month. Its not becuase they dont like staying late. Its because they hate the drama. Drama to me is just another part of life. I deal with it every day and its like my shadow now so im used to it. I love Abercrombie. Its an awesome job. Discounts...discounts..discounts..wooah nelly. And plus the people there are awesome. they are like me. mean and cruel yet wonderfully caring when they have to be. The manager is hot too. and he is gay. woohoo. but...he has dumbo ears so that means he will eventually just fly off..so im not gonna waste my time on this one. i wont object to it happening..but im not gonna be the one that says...'hey u..take off your pants!' no no..not this time. Im gonna be the violated one..not the violator!
I guess since I work at McDonalds I should mention them. <--there i meantioned them. that is all.
Im gonna go down to GCSU sometime soon. I need a friend fix. Since I only have like..what...3 friends here that I hang out with. And thats very rare that I do hang out with them..since i have like ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING TIME OFF!
Im a workaholic..gimmie dat money!
CMM Idol is coming along well. Im in the top 8. Woohoo. Who woulda thought that lil old me would make it. I thought my audition recording sucked becuase I did it at like 8am when I just woke up...well, i guess someone liked it. And then i was in the top 10..and now in the top 8. I feel good. Its a big confidence booster. That and Im starting to get recognized around school as that kid "who sang real good in the karaoke booth that day at school". So woohoo I have a a fanbase again. BUT OF COURSE NOBODY COULD EVER BE AS BIG OF A FAN AS MY DEAR TIFFANY AT GCSU. She is my #1 fan. Love her. She is great. Muah to tiff. I saved yer life biatch you better be my fan hahahahahahahahahahah.
Ok so that is my update. Quick shoutout to some milledgeville folks.
WASSUP TO:
Tiff
Amanda
Stacy
Joshelin
Kayti
Liz
Brandon
Jon
Josh
Lori
Lisa
Claire
well fuck that it takes too long. To the whole city of Milledgeville..not including Andy Cisick, Josh Carter, and Janoah Hill,..WASSUP. To those three. Fuck you, you hypocrite bastards.
THANK YOU! YOU ALL ARE SO WONDERFUL.
Coming to a stage near u!
BRIAN! |
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| And on top of all this... |
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| 11:24pm 29/09/2003 |
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No sex. I dont think there will be for a while either. I could easily..its just a phone call away. But umm, yea i dont think Im really feelin that anymore. I feel very statutory rapist-ish as far as that goes. Ahhhhhh well. Im not too worried about it though. Maybe I should actually try to find a steady person to be in a relationship with, i think its time for that. I dont like this random hookup thing anymore, its no fun. All that developes is DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA and more DRAMA. My GCSU folks know allll about the drama that follows me like a shadow.
....im leavin today...livin it...leavin it...to change....
slowly drifting..into a peaceful breeze. I feel kinda cooled off now. I can see a big change in the near future.
Sorry Chris if this isnt an interesting read.
B* |
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| Drama Drama Drama |
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| 11:18pm 29/09/2003 |
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lots of drama going down at the Prendergast household. I dont like it. I think im gonna end up moving out pretty soon..i cant take it anymore.
...i just wanna get away...savin all your bullshit for another day...
B* |
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| I LOVE U LEIGH |
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| 11:55pm 26/09/2003 |
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Remember the last few days of last year when we all gathered in yer room and listened to Please Remember and all those songs that have become so meaningful to us? Those are the days I want to always remember, because those are the days that all of us were together and knew we would be great friends for the rest of our lives. O and we cant forget THE BENCH. I may be gone..but the BENCH crew is still alive and well..it dont matter if Im 2 hours away. And we will have another Waffle House trip dammit. |
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| Well Isnt this nice... |
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| 04:18pm 25/09/2003 |
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Here is a nice lil message to me from Prince Of Pop on LiveDaily..please bash him, badly...5 times.
"I just needed to tell you in private the piece of **** I think you are...worst than ****, at least **** makes flowers grow...you are useless and disgusting like a used tampon.
You have nothing but negativism in you...And you are so ****in' hypocrite and jealous, you were the one along with ChicoMalo45 that said Steggy sucked and heard her stuff and was crap and then there you are saying "you love her music", you are the one calling yourself "King Bitch" and then saying "Oh I'm sorry for saying this"...you are just a hypocrite mother****er not even man enough to stick to one point of view, at least I don't jump around and shift my values to "try to make myself look good".
And you are such a jealous bastard...like when you said you wanna see the Hilton sisters' downfall...why? because you can't stand seeing other people better off than you...that's why you made that stupid comment "liar liar pants on fire" when I met Xtina even though I posted pics about it and you kept saying it...along with the "oh I'm so sick and I'm gonna die so please everybody feel sorry for me" girl and Miss Piggy...who is the truly conceited one.
I dont' suck, you suck...and badly, I'm here learning about the industry, making contacts, performing, modelling, auditioning and meanwhile tryin' to help other people out with the same goals I have...and I don't let anyone put me down ever, specially if they don't know **** about me...you think that with this attitude I'm not gonna get anywhere? Sorry sweetie...but you are the one not going anywhere...What are you doing for life besides acting like if you were Simon? what are you doing for your goals if what you want to do is perform? you have a severe case of insecurity...you project your insecurities in others that are stronger and better than you.
You are by no meanings better than me...you can say you are better singer, so what? singing notes doesn't make you successful or makes you someone or makes you an artist, neither makes you a good person...
And for your actions, being hypocrite and jealous and negative you only show how low you are...And me even if I seem conceited or a *****...I'm a nice person and I'm strong and I don't go around hurting people because they are better than me in some way.
Remember there's a thingy called "karmic boomerang"...you'll receive what you give to others...and what you've given so far is negativism and hypocrecy...and what have I given? some attitude and positivism...
Think about it sweetie, because at the end of the day it's you who'll have to deal with your own mess...not me...I'm done with you, that's all I had to say." |
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| People get on my nerves |
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| 12:42am 24/09/2003 |
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I fucking hate LiveDaily posters...well...only one inpeticular...that stupid ass Prince of Pop guy. Im sorry but he is the most concieted little flaming gay bastard to ever walk this planet. he is a complete waste of space on this planet, not to mention he is using up too much of the oxygen that i need to survive. fucking fool. will he ever learn not to mess with me? i will only get his little happy ass banned if he fucks with me too much. ahhhhhhhhhh people frustrate me. he thinks he is a singer, he is nothing, he is worse than that fucking "ut oh...ut oh" girl. just wait til he hears me sing. it will be all over and he will be bowing down to me..the fucking King B* that is all.
B* |
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| I have had a rough month. |
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| 02:38am 22/09/2003 |
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So its officially been a month and 2 days since I left school for that bullshit incident with the redhead bitch who likes to steal my roomates shit and pawn it and then blame it all on me and cause us both jailtime for 2 days. dumb bitch. i hope she gets hit by a train or something. no..thats too quick. i hope that one day i get the chance to dip her slowly into boiling hot water so i can watch her expression on her face as she slowly burns and then dies. that would put a smile on my face. Is that mean?? I dont think it is. It would only be mean if I was to dip her in and then pull her out and then do it repeatedly over and over until she dies. that would be mean,but it would probably but an even bigger smile on my face! aww..fun times.
So...Im back here, and even tho I miss it and all I am glad that I am back. School wasnt the same anyways. I didnt get to see my friends every 5 minutes like i used to so i wasnt really feeling it. plus i lived in a dorm where it was 1 floor of guys and 2 floors of girls so there was wayyy too much estrogen in there anyways for me to handle.
Im slowly plotting how I am going to become famous. Its a big secret that nobody will know and then all of the sudden out of the blue I will say..o yea by the way i got a record deal and my single will be out in a few months. Yea..its gonna be like that. Nobody will believe me and then I will be all over TV and radio and everyone will want to be me, do me, and have my babies.
So im sitting here contemplating whether or not I want a cigarette. I have a bad throat problem right now because I am sick. OK..imagine Christina singing at the 2000 VMA's..yea my voice sounds nasty like that. Hmm, i wonder if maybe a menthol cig will help..u know..since it has menthol and all. I Wonder???
Work is really kicking my ass. Ive been working too much. I am gonna have another Mariah Carey breakdown I can feel it coming. Im just a few hours away from it. Just to let u know my days involve waking up to be to work at 11 and then working til 1 or 2am. And thats mostly everyday people. And when I do have a day off Im usually doing exhausting activities that are too ex rated to talk about on this journal. But hey..thats what life is all about..sex..and work. Its either im whoring myself at Abercrombie being there greeting people or Im off...well..whoring. So yea, thats my life in a nutshell.
Does this sound excentric. i feel like it does. it probably is. Its like 3am almost and Im still running off Caffiene pills and nicotine and a wierd combination of nasal spray and cough medicine. I wonder if I can get an ass shot...man i love needles. hence the 6 piercings that i have. pretty soon i will be christina aguilera and have 89356864385 piercings, and then one below the border. could u imagine!?
Well..im off to find some cookies anc gummi bears so i can set them up like they are having a party and then come in and kill them all and bite off their heads (its really fun..especially if u act like certain colors are kids..and then u kill them and then make voices like u are the sad parents). Ok, yes, I am delerious now..so consumed...in all my doom. Im off to bed kids. BYE BYE!!
PS. I am not going crazy like Mariah..i never mentioned that bitch J Lo stealing my career once durin this entry. I fucking hate j lo anyways. dumb bitch. |
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| So here it is....just me...B |
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| 11:12pm 22/06/2003 |
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Ok kids. Its time to party. Its gonna be a bumpy ride..so buckle up.
This is my first entry. I dont have much to say right now. Creating this bitch was so omygodiwanttokillmyself boring.
Ok..well talk to you later kids.
You are my new best friend check me every 5 minutes!!
King Bitch |
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